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1. We should put video stores in charge of Homeland Security! You read about all these Terrorists - most of them came here legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 15 years. Now compare that to your neighborhood video store: you are two days late with a video and those people are out looking for you.

2. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession, but it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

3. Why does a "slight tax increase" cost you five hundred dollars and a "substantial tax cut" save you only fifty cents?

4. In the 70's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

5. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; but teach that person to use the Internet and he won't bother you for weeks!

6. Tell a person a story and he will probably believe you; but tell that person about TheRealTruth and he will be incredulous!


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